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The Fear Inside Us


Have you ever been to a phase in your life where you question the worthiness of your self-being?

You feel that the achievements of your life are way below your potential or you feel the sense of dissatisfaction inside you burning and breaking your self piece by piece.

Studies have shown that one-third of the human population is suffering from some kind of anxiety, stress, or mental pressure. People all around the globe irrespective of their race, caste or gender are in the run of proving themselves correct in the eyes of others. There is a non-ending competition being played by each one of us out there who is being exploited and tortured by the complicated social structure made by people like us which judge us on every aspect of life be it financial, physical, attire, or behavioral. The social structure is so rigid that it has murdered more than a million innocent lives but couldn’t be challenged at all.

Here I am taking this bold step to question some of the social institutions which I feel need to be bent or changed completely since the current form of existence is doing more bad to the people than good.

Starting with Marriage, which is considered the most auspicious relationship in this world. But I would love to call it the “certificate of Love”. There are two ways in which people marry one is the so-called Love marriage mostly for the rebellions and the other is Arrange marriage for the Mumma's child. But, I always wonder why on earth one needs a certificate for living with someone you love in the first place? And why there is so much interference of the society and family for the decision which one individual will make for himself for the rest of the life. Isn't it more logical that no one on this entire earth apart from the boy and the girl can judge if they could spend a major chunk of their lives together? Here I am deliberately not mentioning the rest of the life because why do we bound two people to stick together for the rest of their lives. The majority of couples I have interacted in my life are stretching their relationship not because of love but because of the fear of society, lack of financial independence, their children, etc. So where does the love vanish then? And if it does vanish for a major chunk of the population then why it is tabooed and so difficult to be a divorcee in this era of New India?

Why do people spend so much money on weddings to feed and showcase those who are not worth it? I believe only 5 percent of the people who are invited to weddings will help us in our bad times. I don’t see a point of investing so much on the people who are not worth it.

With all these complications and questions there are other complications like caste, religion, and social stature which makes things worse. I am not going to talk about them in detail but we all are aware of it and know how much lives are lost in the name of honor killing, dowry, suicides due to marital problems, and external affairs. So why on this earth we still are not ready to accept that the institution has failed and there is a need to modify it or change it completely?

Then I would jump to the definition of Success. I see people posting photographs of a big businessman or inviting an influential personality whenever they talk about successful humans. But here I would like to ask a very fundamental question to all of them out there, What is their relative parameter which makes them decide that this person wealthier than this is successful? The definition of success should be different for everyone. One cannot judge that this individual is successful and this individual is not. If we are still alive then we should take it as a success. The true meaning of success is inner peace and happiness and it should not be misunderstood with money, power, or fame. Yes having a goal in life is important and working hard to achieve it is necessary but we should not forget that our entire journey is more important than reaching the destination. So from now onwards, we should not try to find a wealthy or powerful individual for inspiration to get successful but someone who is happy and peaceful in his life should be more appreciated.

Now ending my discussion with a very important question to ponder upon which is Do you really need someone’s else approval to feel successful in your life?

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